Travel and holidays - carers and holidays

Information for people with dementia who are considering travelling alone and for carers of people with dementia.

It covers practical information about how to cope with travelling if you have dementia, and what to consider if you are a carer.

We have not included any specific holidays or establishments since these are subject to change. The organisations listed under Useful addresses and specialist holidays can help you source a holiday or break that fits your needs.

Carers and Holidays

Caring for someone with dementia is often very hard work. It can be a 24 hour, 7 day a week job. Getting some time away from it all is very important for several reasons. Everyone deserves a holiday. No matter how much you love someone, caring for them all the time without a break now and then is unlikely to be good for either person. A holiday can allow you to rest, relax and recharge your batteries, and so cope better when you return.

Sometimes carers feel guilty about the idea of having a holiday, especially if they are considering going away without the person with dementia. But it is extremely important to look after yourself properly. After all, if you run yourself into the ground, your own health is likely to suffer, and affect your ability to look after your relative.

You may find it helpful to talk over your feelings about taking a holiday, perhaps with friends or relatives, or completely confidentially on the 24 hour freephone Dementia Helpline 0808 808 3000.

Together or separately?

Once you have made the decision to take a holiday, you will have to decide whether to go with the person with dementia or not.

The positive points for you and the person going away together include:

• you might enjoy a holiday together away from your usual routine
• you might be able to go somewhere where there is help in caring for the person with dementia, to allow you to relax
• you won't have to make other arrangements for the person's care
• you won't worry about how the person is doing while you are away.

On the other hand:

• people with dementia will often be confused and upset by a change of environment. It may be very difficult for them to learn the way around a new place and get used to unfamiliar people
• you may not get a proper break from caring
• you may have a limited choice of where to go
• a long journey may be difficult, especially if the person with dementia tires easily, or has continence or behavioural problems.

The positive points about going on your own or with a friend or relative, other than the person you care for, include:

• you get a proper break
• you can spend some time on yourself, which many carers find very difficult to do from day to day
• you will be less restricted in what you can do or where you can go.

But of course you will have to make alternative arrangements for the person with dementia so that you don't worry while you are away.

Holidays together

Where you can go will depend on what help the person with dementia needs. Often ordinary hotels and guest houses will be very happy to welcome you, as long as you make contact in advance and ask them if they could cope with any special needs the person has. However, they will be unlikely to be able to offer very much help.

You should bear in mind that even someone who is quite independent at home may need more supervision in an unfamiliar place. Consider how much of a holiday it will be for you if you are 'on duty' all the time.

Try not to choose a holiday that means a lot of travelling, or one where you are doing the housework or catering, as that will be no rest for you. It is often a good idea to book a holiday out of season, as staff are likely to be less busy, and to be able to give you more attention. If you can take someone else with you as a helper, you will probably enjoy the holiday more.

Some places offer more help and special facilities. We list some of those in Scotland at the end of this information sheet. The Holiday Care service have information on places all over the UK and abroad which they will send out to you.

Some Alzheimer Scotland branches and services organise holidays for small groups of carers and people with dementia, together with volunteer helpers. Holidays have been arranged by Alzheimer Scotland branches in Edinburgh and Fife, for example. Call the 24 hour Dementia Helpline 0808 808 3000 for details of your nearest Alzheimer Scotland contact.

Community care

Under community care arrangements, you can ask your local social work department to assess the needs of the person with dementia. This includes the need for a holiday or respite care. If they assess the person with dementia as needing a holiday, they have a legal duty to provide one, under section 2 of the Chronically Sick and Disabled Persons Act. They will charge for this according to the person's income. If the social work department assess the person with dementia as needing respite care they should provide it, but they are not legally obliged to do so. They will charge for respite care according to the person's income. 

 If the social work department does not agree that a holiday or respite is necessary, you can ask them to review the assessment, or make a complaint.

Care for the person with dementia while the carer goes away

If you decide to go on holiday without the person you care for, you will probably have to make arrangements for care while you are away. There are several ways of organising this.

Care at home

You may be able to put together a package of care at home with extra time or visits from home helps, care attendant schemes such as Crossroads (contact details at the end of this information sheet) and the health visitor or district nurse. Ask the social work department about this. Friends and neighbours may also be able to help.   Often the simplest is to ask a friend, relative or neighbour to look after the person. They may move in or just undertake to call in as often as necessary and perhaps see to things like meals or shopping.

If no friend, relative or neighbour is available, you may be able to pay someone; perhaps someone with experience as a care attendant or a nurse. You can ask around to see if anyone can recommend someone suitable. Members of your local Alzheimer Scotland or Age Concern and Help the Aged in Scotland branch may know someone.

Another alternative is to advertise locally. If you do this, it is very important to interview the applicants and to take up references. A nursing agency will be able to provide people who should be experienced; but this can be an expensive option. Again, it is important to take up references.

If you are employing someone to care for the person with dementia, you should make the arrangements in advance so that they can get to know each other before you go. You should put in writing what is expected and how much you have agreed to pay. Make sure you leave them written information on what they need to know about the house and appliances, the local shops and the person with dementia's normal routines.

Care away from home – respite breaks

Many local authority and private sector care homes provide respite breaks, although there may be charges for both.  Short term admissions are available in local authority residential homes.  Contact your social work area office to find out about this. Home support schemes may be extended to give overnight or weekend care as part of a package of care organised through a care manager. 

If the person with dementia needs help with the costs of respite care in a residential nursing home, you should contact your local social work department who will arrange to assess your relative's needs. If he or she is assessed as needing respite care, the social work department should arrange this. The cost will depend on the income of the person with dementia.

For a list of care homes in your area, or to read inspection reports contact the Care Commission 0845 603 0890 or visit their website at: www.carecommission.com/index.php

You can also obtain a printed list of care homes in your area by contacting the Dementia Helpline 0808 808 3000.

There is a searchable database of care homes, including those which provide short breaks at:  www.bettercaring.com